Thursday, June 14, 2007

We've Only Just Begun...

Pictures are coming...John and I have embarked on some more firsts for us over the past few weeks. Tennis, our first Memorial Day, our first year Anniversary- that has to be the biggest first!!

Lately I had been thinking a lot about what life was like a year ago- thinking back through our wedding week and the end of things last year. The last day of my job, packing boxes, wrapping presents for thank you's, picking my fiance' up from the airport, the last night in my childhood room, the last morning at home- that's never home like it was when your name was Gordon. Now it's Mom and Dad's house- somewhere I hope to go back and visit. Even though Virginia doesn't feel completely like home, I can never go Wisconsin home again- once choosing to enter into that new covenant with the man I love - so much has to change. And think of the marvelous things that have brought about change...I see John everyday- he has become more of my best friend than he was when we were dating and he has become such a solid support for myself.
I have learned that a new environment will show you what you are made of. Characteristics I did not realize possessed- a sobering realization when they are not all Christ-like...You disconver the good and bad- the fact that you are stronger and weaker than you thought, more persistent yet easily wearied, convinced of God's working- but often questioning His plans and purpose for you when He feels far away. And I think , "When will it be normal and Virginia will be home?" Maybe that is not in my good and righteous God's plan- I can only look at this as His way of pursuing me through more than I can comprehend.
I used to listen to 'Home' and think of John and place him as my home- and he is my home- if nothing else seems 'normal' there is the constancy of my husband and the relationship that we share...and even with all of that it's not enough without the pursuit of Christ between both of us- really, with Christ we should be content wherever we are with the knowledge of His love and the opportunity to glorify Him- in the end this world is not where we belong anyways- we have a heavenly country and a heavenly Bridegroom. Even so come, Lord Jesus...

3 comments:

Karis said...

Happy Anniversary! A year sure does change a lot of things!!!

Unknown said...

A new home, a new church, a new job, a husband -- all those changes in your life at one time are pretty major! And yet, God knows and cares about all you are adjusting to! In fact, He is using these changes to mold you and make you more like Him! You are doing great, Bethany. Thanks for being such a wonderful wife to John! We love you!
Mom Varner

jess said...

Hey girl, I just found you! Nice to read your reflections on your jouney to "normal." I think we've all been there, and just when you think you've found it, life changes again! I guess it's part of what we need to be humble and dependent. Have fun with all that wedding action this summer.